Quasi-Belloc

From the school magazine....

 THE DREADFUL FATE OF NEIL MESS,
A PUPIL OF GEELONG GRAMMAR SCHOOL
WHO REFUSED TO OBEY HIS ELDERS AND BETTERS AND TOOK HIS RUG TO THE PICTURES.

1. Mess was not the sort of Boy who filled the master's heart with joy.
Hid dress was wild, his speech uncouth,
He hardly ever told the truth,
And never changed his socks.
He would continually purloin
Large quantities of Notes and Coin,

And many boys remember still
His most extraordinary skill
At picking awkward locks.

2. On Saturday the pupils all
went to the Bracebridge Wilson Hall
To see a moving picture show:
The temperature was twelve below,
And Neil took his rug.
A master with a stifled shout,
Observed the rug and and sent him out.
He left the hall with wrathful frown,
Procured a match, and Burnt
                                       It
                                          Down,
 Exclaiming with a shrug,
"!*@iip+=¿Ð!"

They gave the boy the punishment
The dreadful crime demand.
He went before the head and was
Severely reprimanded.

MORAL

Remember rules are always right:
Do not attempt correction
Of what Much Wiser Men Than You ²
Laid down for your direction.

² Please, reader, do not look on this
As personally directed
Present company of course,
Is naturally excepted.

¹  Note well this reading has been made
In Fahrenheit, not Centigrade.

This is the first and only time
I have been forced to use this sort
   of rhyme.

It was (a) on a recent decision to ban rugs from the Hall and (b) an unfair and scurrilous attack on a boy I didn't much like at the time.  He took it badly, as one would imagine.  I'm glad to say that he forgave me at the sixtieth anniversary meetup.