Corrections to the blogosphere, the consensus, and the world

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Commonplace book

Nabokov joke:
It is always rather perilous for a writer to try to toy with a foreign idiom. I like to recall the case of the famous Russian writer Herzen who, living in Putney and knowing very little English, illustrated a brilliant essay on the Britisher's innate contempt for poverty by the unfortunate remark that the worst invective commonly heard in London streets was the word "beggar."

Vladimir Nabokov

I don't know, I've never kippled

And with today's announcement of more Australian troops to Afghanistan, a good time to revisit this:

With home-bred hordes the hillsides teem,
The troop-ships bring us one by one,
At vast expense of time and steam,
To slay Afridis where they run.

Strike hard who cares--shoot straight who can--
The odds are on the cheaper man.



Spellcheck again

One thing that the programs seem to regard as a feature, not a bug, is a very non-Aussie approach to hyphens. Even when in English (Aus) as a language the program will correct icecream to ice cream, titbits to tit-bits, and so on. I'm not sure whether their Australianisation is superficial, simply a matter of s's and z's, or whether they think this is the correct usage, even here.

Age bin - opium

I think I'm going to use the word 'opium' in a sentence.
"I opium mother is feeling better this morning."
Dorothy Parker

Letter to Age:
So we’re off on another drug eradication crusade in Afghanistan, just as Australia adds more hostages to our force there. It’s fair to say, I think, that when you spray weedkiller on people’s crops they get pissed off at you; and it’s only reasonable to note that when Afghans get pissed off they shoot people, some of them Australians. Tasmania, too, grows opium poppies. There, however, we avoid getting people pissed off by the simple expedient of buying the product off them to make medical morphine. If the Americans didn’t insist that everybody else in the world joined them in their moral panics we’d have more returned servicemen and fewer military funerals.


Noting, to be fair, that the Centre for Research on Globalisation disagrees with me; however, their arguments appear to deal with the flaws of a payment scheme in reducing the flow of opiates rather than its effect on the war, so I'll hang in there. The folks at the Centre say, for example, that if you paid for opium the price would go up and the growers would simply make twice as much in two lots, one for the legal scheme and one for the illegal scheme; possible, I admit, but still producing fat happy growers rather than skinny pissed growers, so not an argument against my proposal. Fixing the general problem of drugs around the globe will doubtless take more than that, but it would still require the Americans to make more use of common sense than they've ever shown any signs of in this area.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Why I hate Bill Gates

One of the irritating things about my life is that I’ve always thought that I had no route to vast riches; the money-making schemes I think up have always been thought of before. One of the even more irritating things is when this turns out not to have been so, and that nobody had in fact thought of it.

Some ten or so years ago, I noted that the spelling programs that correct OCR text were falling down consistently on tasks that should have been simple. Any halfway decent linguist – more to the point, I myself – could suggest after ten minutes’ work fixes that would lift the performance by orders of magnitude. I could at that time have grabbed a coder and settled down to do this work, but I assumed – and I still don’t blame myself too much – that these were so obvious that they’d be fixed in the next iteration and I’d have wasted my time.

Ten years later and the spelling correction programs in Microsoft Word are as bad and as unthinking as ever. And I could now, I suppose, still grab a coder and settle down to do this work, but I still can’t believe that the flaws aren’t so blindingly obvious that they will finally be fixed in the next iteration and I’ll have wasted my time.
The basic principle is unarguable, and it’s utterly opaque to me why the spelling programs don’t grasp it.

Let’s input those principles now. Hell, that principle; there's only one, with three sections.

Text mistakes are not random. They occur because
(1) in scanning, some combinations of letters look very like other letters.
(2) in typing, some letters are next to other letters.
At the moment, absolutely all the attention of the programs is focussed on
(3) in writing, some words are misspelled.
Which is probably the least important.

Let’s look at the spelling program working through a page scanned off a rather poor fax.



Misspelled WordActual wordSuggestion
Departrnent Departmentno suggestions
ConcemsConcernsconches
fa~nilyfamilyfancily
mernbersmembersmourners
DISABIUTYDISABILITYDISUNITY
SyndrorneSyndrome Sandrine
I)ocumentsDocumentsI)documents

Or, by simple deduction,

Misspelled WordRule that was appliedSuggestion
Departrnent What word begins with Departr?no suggestions
ConcemsWhat word beginning with conc shares most letters with Concems?conches
fa~nilyWhat word shares most letters with fanily?fancily
mernbersWhat word shares most letters with mernbers?mourners
DISABIUTYWhat word shares most letters with DISABIUTY?DISUNITY
SyndrorneSearch me Sandrine
I)ocumentsScramble, scramble, what word shares most letters with ocuments?I)documents

The problem here is that the scrambling of letters, which is the primary worry of this software, is a fairly rare source of errors.

This would not be particularly difficult to fix.

First page.
Are you
Correcting scanning? Click here X
Correcting typing? Click here





Misspelled WordRule that's neededActual word
Departrnentr n looks like m – check if substitution produces a word Department
Concems m looks like rn – check if substitution produces a wordConcerns
fa~nily ~n could be m or r n – check if substitution produces a wordfamily
mernbersr n looks like m – check if substitution produces a wordmembers
DISABIUTYLI looks like U - check if substitution produces a wordDISABILITY
Syndrorner n looks like m – check if substitution produces a word Syndrome
I)ocumentsI) looks like D – check if substitution produces a wordDocuments

The fact that one sub-rule would have removed half the errors gives some clue to the ease of the enterprise. Run through a couple of thousand examples and you’d knock over 99% of the problems. WHY HAS NOBODY DONE THIS?

How true

Dear dead days

I dig up and send off to the Age a letter last not used by them on Wednesday, November 23, 2005.

The more things change, etc.

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